Jacqueline Newman joins the panel to talk about steps to take before getting a divorce.

Below is an excerpt of our discussion with Jacqueline Newman, a well-respected collaborative New York City divorce lawyer and an expert in matrimonial law in New York.

The most difficult type of client to work with are those that are so angry at their spouse that they are unable to see how that anger and their reaction to that anger is hurtful to their children and ultimately to their case. I talk a lot to the clients that are having that experience and attempt to make them understand how the anger they are currently feeling is temporary, while the effects of this anger can be permanent. I joke with clients that “I am their most expensive therapist.” I also advise clients (in a less joking manner) that if they continue to involve the children in their anger, they should factor in the cost of lifetime therapy bills for their children and themselves when calculating the cost of their divorce.

Like snowflakes — no two divorce cases are alike because no two people are alike. Everyone comes with their own particular life history and therefore everyone experiences their relationships differently.
One of the biggest problems in the divorce field is that judges have too much discretion when rendering legal decisions

Family Law proceedings can be both mentally and financially draining which is why we spoke with six experts from around the world to acquire their advice on issues such as drafting child support, deciding whether court or dispute resolution is the most appropriate method and contemporary matters including the role of the media in family courts and the use of private investigators or spying tactics.

I have always been interested in matrimonial law. My parents were both psychologists, but I was too aggressive to be a therapist, so matrimonial law seemed like the logical choice.

I believe that I help people get to a better place in their lives. I build real relationships with my clients, as I become one of their most trusted advisors. I truly care that my clients and their children walk out of the divorce experience as unscathed as possible. Divorce is a terrible process, but I like to think that with the proper amount of attention to both their concerns and the law that I can make a bad situation better. It makes me feel good to know that I can provide that service for them.

Losing the battle and winning the war is great in concept, but most of us have at one point in our lives yielded to the alternative principle: getting tripped up on the petty.

I asked one of Manhattan’s top litigators, Jacqueline Newman, Esq. of Berkman, Bottger, Newman & Schein, LLP, to help me comprise a list of the craziest things we’ve seen or heard of couples fighting over in a divorce case. Here’s the top five:

What is the difference between mediation and collaborative law?

I tell my clients there are three ways to divorce, via: mediation, collaborative law or litigation. Most people know what litigation is, as litigated cases make for good television and fun sensationalistic articles. However, few people are aware of their other options.

Many people visualize themselves getting married; nobody daydreams about tension-filled evenings, when you’re considering the legal ramifications of stabbing your spouse with a salad fork.

For couples ready to part ways, a collaborative divorce is a strategy taken by those who want to avoid the slash-and-burn route that divorces often take. It’s the concept that you were partners – even if not good ones – throughout your marriage and you should be able to end it together as well, deciding how to split assets and how the co-parenting should work out in a way in which neither party feels too disappointed when it comes time to sign the divorce papers.

Family Law Attorney Jacqueline Newman helps to explain the bizarre situation with a judge’s ruling about a child’s name.