Thriving & Surviving After a Divorce

Originally aired on Today EXTRA

Is there really such a thing as a perfect divorce?

“Well I think it somewhat depends on how you define ‘perfect.’ But, for the most part, I would say there are definitely divorces that are very very difficult, but there are some that can be amicable – people can realize that just because they are no longer good spouses, you’re still good people and they can be good parents.”

What’s the most common thing women tend to worry about when they start their post-split life?

“A lot of women worry about dating. They worry about getting back into the world. Self-esteem can be affected, obviously, through a divorce, so people get nervous about that. I think that, that and finances – I think that women also those that are not financially savvy, say their husband took care of the money – that could be a really big worrisome thing for them as well.”

What about for men? Do they process and deal with things differently in their post-divorce life?

“You know, men do. I’ll tell you, men also are very worried about dating. But a lot of men will focus on work – they’ll throw themselves into work. Men will sometimes become much more isolated after divorce, sometimes because their wives have been the social planner – their ones who made a lot of figuring out who they were going out with, and when. So a lot of men will isolate themselves, but they also do also worry about dating – and finances of course.”

What’s the first thing if you’re a woman that you should do?

“Well, I would say see a divorce attorney… they should become very aware of what the finances [are], as much as they can about what’s going on with finances. And generally, one of the things that I always tell people, once they’ve gone through the divorce, I recommend people to get themselves a divorce present – do something for yourself, you’ve just gone through a terrible process.”

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